Ewe Will Never Believe It
BR549M1
Dear Penthouse Forum,
For as long as I can remember having sexual urges I’ve had what I call an ‘urethral fixation’. My pee-hole has always fascinated me, and I’ve enjoyed sounding and catheter/catheter-like-object play for many years. I can’t remember how many years I’ve been able to insert my gloved index finger into my urethra as far as it can reach. By carefully ‘accordion folding’ my penis as I insert the finger, it’s possible for me to reach far enough inside that the finger is actually inside my pelvis. Then wiggling it around stimulates both prostate and rectum together, a feeling that has to be experienced to be understood. Trying to describe it to someone would be as pointless as trying to tell a blind man what the colour red looks like. I know, this seems like a side-track to nowhere, but bear with me as it is pertinent to the tale I’m about to relate.
A few years ago I had custody of and responsibility for several sheep, both rams and ewes. Did I enjoy this? You betcha! While I’m mainly a horse and dog fornicator, being both zoo-ish and a confirmed try-sexual. I had carnal knowledge with all of the ewes in my care at one point or another, always doing my best to fertilise them. Leaving my sperm deep inside them. I know it can’t happen, but that doesn’t stop me from having an incredibly strong fantasy involving impregnating one of my female partners. I also managed to be bred by all four of the rams. Not really that impressive, to be honest, but what the heck. Even though none of them had a penis thicker than my thumb, the length and the stiff but flexible part of the fibro-elastic type penis that sheep, goats, and cattle use made for a fuck that was at least interesting. I wouldn’t turn down the chance to do it again, that’s for sure.
After much pleasant experimentation with inserting ram’s penises into various orifices, both my own, various ewes, and other rams from time to time, I reached the conclusion that a ram’s penis might make a VERY interesting catheter/sounding toy. With this in mind, I thought about how to get a ram to actually breed my cock. Could it be done at all? Would it be worth the effort? At the time, I obviously didn’t know, but I figured I could damn sure give it a try.
Imagine lots of tedious tinkering, trying to get things to work just right. After dozens of sessions, I found myself concentrating on one ram whose penis was particularly slim and long. He was slim enough that he only caused me a few slight twinges of pain the first few times he penetrated my urethra. His length was sufficient to pass the head of his penis fully into my bladder, exactly like a large catheter. The head, with its little wiggler sticking off the end, was just a bit larger than the second knuckle of my finger, at least by guesstimation, so it looked at least possible. After giving it a try, I found that it was indeed pretty easy for me to accept as much of his penis as either of us wanted to pass into my urethra.
It took some experimenting to figure out how to stimulate him enough to mount and seek for penetration, yet not get him so excited he blew up on the launch pad, but finally I caught the trick of it. By the time I was done tinkering, I could keep him extended and hunting for the hole for a bit over a minute and a half at a time. Plenty of time for what I wanted to do. My goal was nothing short of having him actually ejaculate into my urethra. He had the length to do it. In fact, if I controlled him just right (and I often did – remember I mentioned I liked catheter play) I could actually ease him through my urinary sphincter and into my bladder so that he bumped against the top. I can’t describe how much I liked that feeling.
After much experimenting, definitely enjoyed by myself, and presumably enjoyed by the ram since he kept coming back time after time, we finally got the hang of each other’s desires, and fulfilled them. It was not only possible, but after the extensive practice we both had, I could reliably get him to mount a special dummy, where I had access to his sheath and penis, and with that access, it was fairly easy to guide his penis into mine until the head of his penis was just bumping against my bladder, right where I wanted it to be. A few finger-twiddles from the one I had up my bum helping to guide his stiff, but fortunately, not stiff-as-a-board penis past the curve around my pubic bone, and he’d ejaculate in a quick series of five or six spasms, almost like something buzzing inside me. Leaving his entire load of semen in position for the next phase of my evil plan.
The other side of this plan was the idea that there was a pair of twin ewes in another area. The only contact of any kind they had with a male since their sire squirted his seed into their mother was when I walked into the pen they lived in. At two years and five months, they had each lost their virginity to me two nights apart. So far as I’m aware, aside from mine, no penis, of any species, ever entered either their anus or vagina. You see the experiment I’ve set up, don’t you?
After setting up a temporary pen where they could touch noses with the ram, but not much else, it took a few weeks before the three of them were telling me that one of the ewes was in heat. OK, here we go… Operation ‘Daddy Sheep’ is now in progress!
I haltered the ewe who was showing heat, and brought her over to the spot where I most often coupled with the ewes, tethering her near a small bier of hay, veggies, and grain that I knew she liked. The bier was there for exactly that reason. I wasn’t being sentimental, as in wine her, dine her, sixty-nine her. At least not on purpose, this time, it was purely practical. Almost no real romance at all. It was all about keeping her occupied while I did my best to impregnate her, for real.
I had a bucket of warm water nearby, positioned a few minutes ago when I had decided that she was ready, and wiped down her anal/vaginal area until she was squeaky-clean. There were, as is usual for sheep, a few dingle berries, so the scissors on my Leatherman tool came into play, trimming them away. Once I was happy with how tidy she was, I popped the top off the tube of KY I’d brought with the bucket. After carefully sliding the tip of the tube into her vulva and squeezing in a generous dollop, I applied a thick coating to her vulva, pressing some into her, then chasing it and the blob I’d already squeezed inside her with a finger and giving her a twiddle. I wanted no chance of sticking, since I already knew that what I had in mind would need to be done fairly quickly if it was to work at all. Adding another coating externally, I was ready to pull the trigger on this demented plan I’d been brewing.
I gathered up the ram, bringing him over to the pen the dummy was in, and after getting my bottom half naked, we assumed our performance positions, and I proceeded to harvest a semen sample from him by helping him use my urethra as an artificial vagina.
I’d placed the head of his penis so that I could feel it as a lump in my prostate, and when he ejaculated, I was able to press my urethra shut through my poop-chute as he withdrew, keeping all of his Sheepy goodness deep inside my own reproductive tract. Experimenting had taught me that I’d have about five, maybe ten minutes, at the outside, before his semen would start dribbling out of me, so I quickly led him over near the ewe I’d tethered, and put him on the end of a snap-line that was set so they couldn’t get close enough together to actually mate, before I approached the ewe who was already stepping toward me eagerly.
She was just coming that way because I was between her and him, and I damn well know it. I harbour no illusions about sheeply devotion, and snuggled in for what I had planned so long towards. I was going to actually breed a sheep. I was going to ejaculate inside her, and maybe, just maybe, she’d get pregnant from the act!
After the extended affair (That’s sarcasm you’re standing in, kid, watch your step, it’s kinda slick, sometimes) that makes up the sheepese version of may I try to impregnate you? I wasted as little time as possible, quickly lathering the tip of my rapidly stiffening penis with some of the extra layers of KY I’d put on the outside of her vulva, and moving into position to cover her. With almost no pressure needed at all, I slipped my penis through the dusty grey-black gates of her vulva, into the wet pink of her vestibule, over her urethra, which I could I feel as a tiny dimple. Finally, after about two-inches of my penis had disappeared into her body, I felt the constriction that indicated I was about to actually enter her vagina proper.
I kept pressing as the tension eased, and passed into my goal. My penis is seven-and-a-half-inches, and now as deep inside an in-heat ewe vagina as I could get it. I was about to pump a mixed load of human and ram semen into her! Things proceeded apace, I was so excited by the idea that I just might succeed in impregnating her that it didn’t take long before I reached orgasm. If my count is accurate, I pumped either twelve or thirteen jets of semen into her as deep as I could possibly reach. A usual shoot for me is four or five, sometimes six jets so maybe that helps you imagine how strong this fantasy is for me.
Rather than withdrawing, I let my erection shrink, still inside her, until it fell out on its own. Then for good measure, massaged her vulva until she had 3 separate groups of contractions that I can only assume are a ewe’s equivalent of an orgasm. Only a couple drops of the “hybrid semen” appeared on her vulva, and I was wondering how soon I could go again (I knew that the ram was already set for another go-round of loading me. I once watched and assisted as he serviced three ewes in just over fifteen-minutes, then came to me and squirted inside me twice more) when I realised that my penis was already showing signs of stirring back to life.
Well, if he’s game so am I. I remember thinking that if things worked out as I hoped, I’d want the dummy a whole lot closer. Which meant a time-out in the whoopie while I retrieved my britches and put them on. The dummy was stout, but since it was built of wood cutouts and canvas, covered with a tanned fleece, it was pretty easy to move around with a two-wheel dolly. So that’s what I did, parked it on his side of the zone where the two could get almost-but-not-quite within mating distance of each other.
It didn’t take long (about twenty-five minutes, or thereabouts) before I was able to make iron again, during which time I helped the ram service my urethra twice, putting a double load into my chamber. Once I was able to get stiff enough to enter her, I did, with the predictable result that I eventually achieved orgasm for the second time, depositing a load of semen that was part mine and part the ram’s as deep inside her vagina as I possibly could. I know from experience that sheep vaginas are bottomless, and so I knew better than to think I had a chance at snuggling the head of my cock against her cervix and doing a direct injection, but I TRIED, dammit!
Anyway, to make a long, potentially repetitive and boring story a bit more concise, she didn’t catch the first time. But I wasn’t going to despair, I could keep trying and I did. It took eight heats, until she finally got pregnant without a ram’s penis ever getting close enough to even squirt a drop on her, never mind getting it inside her! I was the soon-to-be father of a baby sheep!
Yes, I know that it was just a complex (but quite pleasant) version of Artificial Insemination, basically the same though the tools used to do it were different. As done probably thousands, perhaps millions of times around the world every day, but I did in fact impregnate her by having sex with her and ejaculating inside her! On many occasions! Just let’s not snitch to the sensible part of my mind that it was only because I’d let a ram ejaculate inside ME before each cover.
I wonder if you folks would consider it bragging when I note that when this ewe delivered, it was twins? A pair of ‘all the right parts appear to be in all the right places’ rams. They grew up to be eventually sold to two breeders, who never did, and so far as I’m concerned, never will know how they were conceived.
Since then, I’ve used this method to father a total of nine lambs that I know for certain are living proof that, under the right circumstances, a sheep CAN have a human’s baby. Or at least, have a baby as a result of having a human ejaculate in her vagina. A subtle, but important distinction. I know they were mine because they were the offspring of the twins that had never had male contact with their own species, unless you count the ram babies that they birthed. Possibly as many as fifteen more among the rest of the flock might also have been due to my breeding of ewes while loaded up with the ram semen, or might have been normal breeding. No way that I know of to make the distinction, so I only claim the nine I know of for certain. The others may only be wishful thinking. Either way, I count nine for-sure sheep-human babies, and in some ways, wish I might get the chance to do it again sometime.
So there you have it. The true tale of how I managed to father nine lambs.
Anybody else got a similar tale, with any species? I’ve never heard so much as a hint of anyone else who has, but I find the idea that I’m the only person who’s ever had the idea, or perhaps even tried it, to be too unrealistic to be taken seriously.
Yours
The Breeder.
